The tone is of the utmost importance in a film like ADAM’S RIB. There is no villain; rather two very likable, equally talented protagonists squaring off in a battle we want to see them both win. If either character seems weaker, or if the audience prefers one to the other, the entire film fails. ADAM’S RIB succeeds because of the wonderful chemistry and balance between stars Spencer Tracy and Katherine Hepburn, working together for the sixth time in their careers.

Tracy plays assistant district attorney Adam Bonner. Hepburn is his wife, defense attorney Amanda Bonner. Adam gets assigned the sensational case of Doris Attinger (Judy Holliday), a wife accused of attempting to murder her husband after finding him in the arms of another woman. Sympathetic Amanda decides to defend the woman, setting up a battle in court between two pairs of husbands and wives.

For the audience, Doris’ guilt is not in doubt. Before we met the Bonners, we follow her as she spies on her husband, then, after shakily reading an instruction manual, breaks up her husband’s tryst and fires erratically at the pair, hitting him in the arm. Amanda’s case does not dispute Doris’ actions, only her intentions. She passionately argues for a woman’s equality in the eyes of the law; if a man had burst in on his cheating wife and injured her, he would be seen as justified and would not be charged of a crime (Remember that this film took place in 1949, before the womens liberation movement). Doris was, according to Amanda, merely protecting her family from the advances of a home wrecker. Adam merely argues for justice under the letter of the law; one person shot another and that is illegal.

The balance between Tracy and Hepburn comes from the way the script, by Ruth Gordon and Garson Kanin, puts the emphasis on the pair’s compatibility, rather than their differences. Adam and Amanda are a loving couple, and though he is a political conservative, he is supportive of his working wife. He helps cook dinner, and even cries from time to time. A less intelligent movie would make Adam a male chauvinist and turn the courtroom scenes into a barrage of insults. Here he is simply a man who believes in the law, and in an impassioned speech in a closet of his home, argues for its sanctity. “Good or bad, the law is the law!” he pleads. “If the law is bad, then let’s change it!” Certainly, women deserve equal rights, but should they have the equal right to get away with attempted murder? Amanda believes in a just cause, but may be fighting for it at the wrong time and place. Obviously, the name “Adam” refers to the title and all it suggests, but notice the very deliberate name selection for Hepburn’s character: “a-man-da.”

Every review of a Tracy/Hepburn film must mention their offscreen romance, and now this one is no exception. Tracy was married to another woman but, as a practicing Catholic, refused to divorce, and instead lived a life separate from his wife with Katherine. The two were familiar costars and longtime lovers by the time ADAM’S RIB was made, and perhaps because they were playing roles they could never assume in real life - husband and wife - they appear a truly happy couple, at least until the case begins to tear them apart. Their styles; his subdued, hers boisterous, fit their parts perfectly and Hepburn looks sexier here than in films from a decade before.

Hopefully the arguments in ADAM’S RIB have largely been put to rest, but just because the film isn’t necessarily relevant doesn’t mean it is not worth watching. Even without topicality, RIB still has the terrific performances from the leads and the hilarious, audacious script. As Bonners’ fighting escalates along with the trial, Adam walks out on Amanda. She orders him not to slam the door. He agrees, then does so anyway, knocking loose a mirror, which sets off a chain reaction that eventually starts the record player, which holds a copy of the song “Farewell Amanda” which a musician neighbor had written for Hepburn’s character. Adam gets the last word in that scene. But not in all of them.

IF YOU LIKED ADAM’S RIB, CHECK OUT: INHERIT THE WIND (1960), the fictionalized version of the Scopes monkey trial, with Tracy as the Clarence Darrow character who defends a teacher after he is arrested for teaching evolution to schoolchildren.

THE BAD

Sean Connery’s last official entry in the James Bond series was 1971’s DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER. Besides Connery’s obvious growing boredom with the role (He’d already quit once, only to return after ON HER MAJESTY’S SECRET SERVICE’s poor reception), he was starting to look a bit old in the part, though he was only forty years old at the time. Roger Moore assumed the role for the first time in 1973’s LIVE AND LET DIE, even though he was already three years Connery’s senior. Moore did the best he could in the role even if most of his Bonds were weaker films, but by 1985’s A VIEW TO A KILL, he was nearly 60, seducing women at least two dozen years younger than him.

Bond’s nemesis in A VIEW TO A KILL is Max Zorin, possibly the most confused evil billionaire in a 007 movie. He is played with maniacal glee by Christopher Walken, who can always be counted on to make anything he’s in at least 15% more interesting. Zorin has at least one Walken character trademark, refusing to answer a question posed by another character. When Zorin first meets Bond, the two discuss sportsmanship, and the spy asks him “Tell me! What about fishing, fly-casting?” Zorin pauses then responds “Excuse me, I’m neglecting my other guests.” It would have been a lot more interesting if Walken had been allowed to espouse his theories of flyfishery for ten minutes. (“You take....the fly...and he, the fly, this is what I think...he is eaten....by the fish...it’s delicious.”)

Zorin’s scheme, codenamed Project Mainstrike, involves controlling the world’s supply of microchips by flooding Silicon Valley after starting a huge series of earthquakes by exploding numerous California fault lines buried deep within oil mines that Zorin controls. What does Zorin need with microchips when he’s already got a hugely successful oil business? Why would he sacrifice his entire oil holdings just for a change to control microchips? Why is his hair bleached blonde? As a wise man once said to me while he sat behind me in a movie theater, “Just shut up and watch ok? It’s a goddamn movie.”

Even as a fan of the character and the series, it’s hard to stay interested in A VIEW TO A KILL, which sticks James Bond in the high-paced, nail-bitingly exciting world of horse purchasing. Before the opening credits, Bond has skied with one foot, turned the front of a snowmobile into a snowboard, and blown up a helicopter. After them, he spends an hour discussing illegal horse steroids. The only interesting thing to look at during this part of the film is the singularly dressed May Day, played by Amazonian woman Grace Jones. Dressed like a mad nun with a leather fetish, May Day is Walken’s enforcer, and she’s certainly an effective one. I wouldn’t want to meet her in a dark alley, nor a well-lit alley, nor any situation in which we were not separated by a sheet of inch-thick bulletproof glass. The woman is scary.

Tanya Roberts plays the “good girl” in the picture, a drilling expert named Stacey Sutton. In the Brosnan Bonds, we’re blessed with much more capable, independent female characters, who may still like 007, but don’t necessarily need his help. Consider Halle Berry’s Jinx from DIE ANOTHER DAY, who nearly got her own spinoff film. Stacey, on the other hand, is a bit of a mess, even if Roberts, a former Charlie’s Angel, was capable of portraying a tougher character. As a result, Bond has to pull her by the hand through the action scenes, barking instructions like “Stretch!” and “Find a hand hold!” which, given Moore’s advanced age, makes him look and sound like an cranky physical trainer.

At a certain point Bond stopped seducing women. By this point in the series, anybody with a vagina - save the demure, eternally ignored Miss Moneypenny - appears resigned to the fact they must sleep with him, not because they want to, or he convinces him to, but because of a strange sexual gender obligation. He is Bond, they are women, therefore they must sleep with him. But how does he convince these women to do so so quickly? Is he drugging these women? Paying them? Is the polluted air down in the mines to induce a sexual hypnotic suggestion? Even May Day - who tries to kill him in every scene they share together - sleeps with him! What was she thinking? “Well he does represent everything I hate, and if he succeeds not only will I be out of a job, but I’ll likely spend the rest of my life in a maximum security prison. But on the other hand he does have sagging manbreasts and combed over, thinning hair. Oh, what they hey -- just this once!”

Even with the nutty Walken and freaky Jones, A VIEW TO A KILL is as much of a chore as a Bond film has ever been. Unless you’re a horse fetishist, or a fan of cars losing their roofs (which occurs three separate times), you’ll be bored. As is often the case with the lead actors in this series, Moore went out on a low note. James Bond would return, but he wouldn’t.

INSTEAD OF A VIEW TO A KILL, CHECK OUT: THE BOURNE SUPREMACY (2004), the superior sequel to 2002’s BOURNE IDENTITY, with way better spy action than anything in VIEW TO A KILL.

THE UGLY

Throughout the 1950’s, the entire science-fiction genre was built on a foundation of bad science. Never have you seen so many men - and they were mostly men - doing so much in the name of science and the protection of mankind from the wrath of monsters and freaks that were frequently created by science themselves. The barrage of pseudoscience bullcrap that these men came up with was always remarkable and often highly entertaining. Here’s a sample of the “science” from the campy delight ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS:

1)Atomic fallout from H-Bomb tests can turn crabs into crab monsters.

2)Crabs monsters cannot be killed with conventional weapons. Bullets and grenades bounce off them harmlessly. Knives pass through them “as if passing through mercury.”

3)The only way to kill a crab monster is with a crab’s only known weakness: electricity.

4)This is because crab monsters are “charged” with “negative energy.” The only way to destroy a crab monster is by creating a device that will shoot bursts of “positive energy.”

5)Should your positive energy machine break down, toppling a radio tower onto a crab monster works equally effectively.

6)Though mountains, caves, and whole islands can be destroyed by earthquakes and underground explosions, a well-built cabin can withstand even the strongest jolt. While the people inside make shake and lose their balance, the items on the cabin’s shelves will never slip, fall, or break.

7)Crab monsters consume every part of their victims, but they do not digest them. Rather they are incorporated whole into their being. The victim’s brain merges with the crab monsters brain.

8)Thus, crab monsters can speak using the voices of those they’ve killed.

9)When luring others into a crab monster trap, crab monsters prefer to speak in the voice of a portly French scientist as dimwitted American scientists are 15% more likely to walk into a trap sprung by a portly French scientist than by scientists of other nationalities.

10)Crab monsters leave normal size crabs all over their crime scenes, possibly in an attempt to frame normal crabs for their misdeeds.

Even as science fiction, these are hard notions to swallow. ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS follows the exploits of an expedition of scientists who head to an island to investigate the disappearance of some other scientists who were there to investigate the impact of H-Bomb fallout on local geology. The crab monsters are a good indication of the wonders nuclear radiation is doing for the environment.

Besides the overabundance of sci-fi nonsense, CRAB MONSTERS’ greatest assets are its petulant titular monsters. Though they do kill a couple of scientists through the traditional beat-stuff-with-your claw method, they much prefer to use fiendish psychological trickery. As we’ve established, these crab monsters can assume the identity - in voice only - of anyone they kill, and they use this talent to lure unsuspecting victims out to caves and pits and other perilous locations for pitch black powwows.

Don’t confuse these crabs and their Michael Winslow caliber vocal talents for a truly efficient killing method. After all, they can’t imitate the person’s appearance, only their voice. For these late night rendezvous with death to work, the victims need to be rock stupid; willing to accept that a man previously thought dead is not only still alive, but now capable of throwing his voice over huge distances. What’s worse, the arrogant crab monsters feel so assured of their powers they give themselves away by talking in third person. “Awake Martha!” a crab monster cries at one point. “It is McClane!” Somehow, dense Martha - allegedly one of a team of brilliant atomic age scientists - actually accepts that McClane, a man who has been dead for weeks has returned to life and is now speaking to her via magic telephone. And he constantly calls himself “McClane!” Martha, please. Take a deep breath. Stop and think. C’mon, crab monster, it’s right there.

The best crab monster moment comes late in the film after the humans have tried a full-frontal assault on the creature with only marginal success. Climbing over a ridge in an unconvincing effect, the beast howls, “So! You wounded me! And I must crow a new claw! Well and good, for I can do it in a day! But will you grow new lives when I have taken yours from you?” Those are some clever intimidation tactics from the crab monsters. And it works well on this bunch of humans, who don’t appear to posses the intelligence necessary to double-knot their shoelaces. One pair of night watchmen who are killed early on are alerted from their post by a strange clack-clack-clacking sound (Crab claws, you see). One turns to the other and says, “Sounds like a kid dragging a stick across a picket fence!” The other nods and responds, “We don’t have no picket fences out here!” Before these two intellectual titans can scour the island for a picket fence, they are felled by the crab monster.

For 62 minutes, ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS barrels along at breakneck speed. The scientists land on the island and before they’ve even finished coming ashore, someone is dead. The high body count and propulsive narrative are completely unwise and utterly implausible, but still slightly unnerving. If the monster wasn’t so brash, and the warm-blooded characters so dumb, this movie could approach a state of spookiness.

IF YOU LIKED ATTACK OF THE CRAB MONSTERS, CHECK OUT: DEATH RACE 2000 (1975), a surprisingly clever Corman-produced cult classic about a cross-country televised in which drivers get points for each pedestrian they run over. Lizzie Grubman could star in the proposed remake.