October 6, 2005
The Best Movies You’ve Never Seen
I’ve been planning on covering these lesser known films for some time now, but have held back because they are but 2 movies and I felt there should be 3 movies you may not have heard of that you definitely should see for a proper column. But it’s been like a year and a half and I haven’t found another film nearly as good as these. So I have given up for your sake because the sooner you see these films, the better off you’ll be.
MY SCHOOLMATE, THE BARBARIAN
The film begins like a Sergio Leone western. A deserted schoolyard, trash blows across like a barrel of hay. A close up of a clock lets you know that something is about to happen. The school bell rings marking the end of the day and everyone leaves in the school in fast motion.
A flick of a foot and a shoe flies off to kill a spider. A shot of a bloody fan. This is TBS Memorial School, a band 5 school (aka, the lowest) and here they have a tradition -- the after school duel. The rules are as follows: the challenged and the challenger take off their shoes, turn on the fans and stand on top of a ring of 55 desks. Whoever hits the floor first loses.
Today’s duel is between Stone (Nicholas Tse), the King of Duel and some other guy who clearly doesn’t matter. Stone is lifted from the ground in the fight and he arches his back to avoid the treacherous ceiling fan. It sheds his shirt off and we see the young heart throb’s well-chiseled physique.
This movie is ridiculous, the sooner you realize this, the better you’ll enjoy it.
Edward (Stephen Fung) is the son of one of those highly successful, highly busy Hong Kong business-people. He goes to the best private school and if he does well on his exams, his mom will buy him a porsche. But she’s never there, replaced by paid minders. As Edward rides his bike to school, they follow in the car.
But he’s kicked out of his exclusive private school due to a misunderstanding orchestrated by a slighted girl. And due to a failure of video phone technology he ends up at TBS.
Edward’s first day at TBS and he is challenged in a duel. So he enlists Stone to teach him to fight. There’s an awful lot of set up for a movie about ass-kicking, isn’t there?
But the movie never goes on too terribly long without a fight. And there’s even a training montage. The fighting is choreographed by Tony Ching -- in between SHAOLIN SOCCER and HERO. There’s plenty of slo-mo to go around but at least the moves are clear and creative and surprisingly it never really gets on my nerves.
Beyond the fighting there’s also a girl, of course -- a cartoonish anime-esque thing who is smitten with Edward. And while Edward’s goal is to learn to fight, Stone has a goal of his own -- In exchange for teaching Edward to fight, Edward teaches Stone how to prepare for the HKCEE (a big end of high school test like the SATs but required).
If you are not familiar with Hong Kong movies (real ones, not the ones made for export), the way this movie is done may be a bit off-putting. Less cutting, less close-ups. But Hong Kong films are praised for their ingenuity and this film has that in spades.
You could easily go this whole movie thinking that it’s not a ridiculous movie. Until the end that is. The end when it turns into a mock video game. If you hadn’t been laughing at the film by then, you’ll probably just be angry.
But chill out, relax and don’t judge and you’ll probably enjoy yourself in spades while watching this ridiculous film. Comedy, Great action, good looking Asian boys -- a perfect mix.
MY SCHOOLMATE, THE BARBARIAN came out in Hong Kong is 2001. It’s surprisingly easy to find, you can even buy it from Amazon, although it’d be cheaper to get it from an importer.
ATTACK THE GAS STATION
Four Korean delinquents have nothing better to do but attack the local gas station. The next day, they still have nothing better to do. But this time, the manager has learned and his wife has taken the money home and he has very little with him. The gang, quite disappointed, decide to work the gas station and take the cash until the manager’s wife returns home and brings the money.
Meanwhile, they end up taking hostages -- the other gas station attendants, people who won’t pay at the pump, gang members who step to them.
Of the delinquents, one is clearly their leader. He speaks, they follow. The ‘dumb’ one is in charge of the hostages, he’s both the most violent and the most gentle. One is flashy -- long hair, silver pants and he likes loud music. And the last is young and quiet (but can serve up a beating as well as any of them). Seemingly little in common except that they’re all lost.
I’ve said it about a million times, but in case you are new -- Korean movies are Hollywood movies. A lot of foreign films differ in structure and conventions. But in mainstream Korean films, they are perfecting the Hollywood formula (and very well).
So as you might expect, we find out how each of these guys became a delinquent and they each begin to redeem themselves. I think of it as a funnier EMPIRE RECORDS.
But don’t let the touchy feely aspects deter you. It’s hard to put into words what’s funny about this movie (and I’m doing a particularly bad job of characterizing it). The actor’s expressions, the expressions of their victims when they get a paddle to the back of the head. Every simple thing from pumping gas to ordering Chinese food becomes part of the comedy.
The comedy has a masochistic edge to it sometimes like Japanese comedy or the show JACKASS. Even if you don't generally think people being beaten is funny, this movie does a good job of convincing you otherwise.
The film ups the stakes with each new person entering the station and each new event that occurs. The delinquents turned gas station attendants and hostage takers face increasingly bigger and bigger problems -- leading up to the huge climactic finale where just about everyone they pissed off all night shows up. When there are gangs and gas, there could be a problem.
This movie is just really satisfying. It consistently entertains and it's a complete movie -- never leaves you hanging. The best way to describe the watching experience -- satisfaction. You can see testimonials in blogs and articles all over the web of people who watched this movie and bought it the next day. It's a great film to have in your collection and pull out for the that friend who's seen everything. It's the film I've been most successful at getting my subtitle-hating friends to watch. It doesn't hurt that it has such an enticing title as ATTACK THE GAS STATION.
ATTACK THE GAS STATION came out in Korea in 1999. It’s also easily available online such as on Amazon, but also cheaper at Asian speciality and import places.
Enjoy.
Japanese Trailers, fantastic!
I know I’m not Christopher Stipp, but here’s some tasty Japanese morsels for you to salivate over. They’re full of CG, action, fun and promise. I make no promise of you ever being able to find or see these movies at any time in the future.
Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children
Haven’t you seen this yet? Everyone else has. It’s the movie that says ‘Suck it, Pixar’. Because it’s so damn beautiful! Look at the pretty.
Shinobi
Ninjas. Hot. Is that an Ayumi Hamasaki song? And how beautiful is that main actress? Anyway, looks like big soppy love story with ass-kicking -- love it!
Ashurajo No Hitomi
More supernatural powered ass-kicking? It’s not possible to have enough. And the strange Sting song at the end? Priceless.
Tetsujin 28
Or as you might know him -- Gigantor! Live action mechs, yet still old-timey. Anyway, mech-punch! Can't get enough.
The Full Metal Alchemist Movie
I heart the FMA anime, so movie? Bring it on!
Hinokio
A touching film about a boy and his robot! The new E.T.!
IN TWO WEEKS: Hong Kong catch-up! I got a shipment of recent and semi-recent DVDs in the mail today and we can all catch up together. Real reviews of Tsui Hark’s SEVEN SWORDS, Johnny To’s BREAKING NEWS, A WORLD WITHOUT THIEVES, ONE NIGHT IN MONGKOK and more!
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