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Week of March 13, 2006

You can take "The Peacemaker," "Deep Impact," and "The Tuxedo." We'll take "Gladiator," "American Beauty" and anything else that didn't suck.

Emilio's 17

Yeah, like he needed all that overpriced crap anyway...

This lawsuit's going to make 'House Party' look like 'House Party Two!'

I told you... don't call me SENIOR!!

Maybe this is all a bad dream too?

Thanks Sharon, but I think I'll wait until this one comes out on DVD (so I can freeze frame of course)

There is absolutely, positively no nepotism in Hollywood. None.

You're good, baby, I'll give you that... but me? I'm magic.

This band will go down like a lead balloon

Well, Goodbye there Children...

They can't sell the Capitol Records building! What will be left to destroy in the next crappy 'end of the world' movie?

Same old Courtney - still sponging off Kurt

Panic on the streets of Austin

You're a fat, Botox faced, wig-wearing ninny! Oh yeah? Well your band has a dirty H addict as a lead singer!

Black Sabbath, Blondie, Miles Davis, The Sex Pistols, Lynyrd Skynyrd Enter Rock Hall



01 THE BREAK-UP $39.17
$12759/av

02 X-MEN: THE LAST STAND $34.02
$9159/av

03 OVER THE HEDGE $20.65
$5170/avg

04 THE DAVINCI CODE $18.61
$4953/avg

05 MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III $4.68
$1756/avg

06 POSEIDON $3.49
$1283/avg

07 RV $3.20
$1469/avg

08 SEE NO EVIL $2.04
$1607/avg

09 AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH $1.36
$17615/avg

10 JUST MY LUCK $855K
$892/avg









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By Alison Veneto

December 15, 2005

This week, the wunderkind of Australia -- the continent, not the country -- has unveiled what is poised to be this year’s biggest blockbuster. Of course, I mean Peter Jackson and his epic KONG. But it’s worthwhile to remember how he started -- by directing low budget horror films.

In that spirit I intend to review for you a new Australian horror flick that is on it’s way to American theaters called WOLF CREEK. It’s a film that’s already got some buzz due to the unique honor of having been bought before it’s premiere at Sundance earlier in the year.

Written and directed by Greg McClean, he’s probably closer to Soderbergh than Peter Jackson. The first half of the film plays like a semi-artistic teenage road movie. Two girls and a guy heading across the country -- if this were French it’d be an entirely different movie (note: the French horror film which I reviewed earlier this year at least had lesbianism).

Liz (Cassandra Magrath) and Kristy (Kestie Morasi) are two British girls on a trip to Australia. In their two weeks vacation so far they’ve made many friends among whom is Ben (Nathan Phillips), an Australian native. He’s volunteered to chauffeur them across the outback to a far away town which promises a good party.

They all take off on the road trip and the vivacious Kristy doesn’t seem to mind her third wheel status as things heat up between Ben and Liz. They go from outpost to outpost driving through ‘the bush’ which at first looks wondrous but soon gets redundant. A stop at a gas station introduces them to the locals and their enlightened and chivalrous attitudes -- as they offer to gang bang the ladies.

On their trip they stop at Wolf Creek -- the site of a large meteor crash. There’s lots of talk of UFOs and of Ben and Liz’s eventual hook-up and even a surprise rain. But they find that when they get back to their cheap used car (which they bought for the trip) -- it isn’t working.

I won’t say any more than this in order to keep you guessing while you watch. It’s nothing you haven’t really seen before but the suspense is important in your ultimate enjoyment. But of course, your car breaking down in the middle of nowhere means serial killer -- doesn’t it?

The movie claims at the beginning to be ‘based on true events’. And the scariness of the film rides on these few words to a large extent. But it turns out, that it’s not based on any one story -- but an amalgamation of similar stories. But the ‘based on’ tag will make people believe they are almost watching a documentary -- ala BLAIR WITCH -- and even my boyfriend and I were ruminating on what was true and what wasn’t until we found out that none of it was specifically true. But the film’s release was initially delayed in one part of Australian due to the trial of a case that is similar. The alleged murderer was convicted only last Tuesday even though the body was never found.

In the film WOLF CREEK, the most obvious choice of killer is the Crocodile Dundee-like Mick Taylor (John Jarrett) who helps the kids out when they’re stuck. It brings up a really interesting dynamic -- between the stereotypical man of the outback and the former British colonizers. While these two flighty girls are as far as can be from those who ‘rule’ Australia -- they also represent leech-like tourists with no interest or understanding of the country they are in. This aspect gives this otherwise typical genre entry added depth.

Yet my biggest problem with this film, and it’s one I often have with horror films, is that the main characters do stupid things sometimes. I’ll never understand why they make some of the decisions they do. Or like when they finally get the car to start and then lean back for a second to celebrate -- if this wasn’t a horror movie where someone was going to pop up, then they would have gotten out of there as fast as possible and sigh of relief later. But characters making idiotic decisions is almost a part of the genre now -- being mocked at length in the uber-post-modern SCREAM series.

But as for the pluses, there is certainly gore in this film and one or two good scares but it’s certainly not wall to wall. There is a lot of build up. A lot. I didn’t have my watch out but it felt like at least 45 minutes until their was any kidnapping or torture. But once it starts, it’s non-stop till the end as most films of this ilk are.

Australia (and New Zealand) has put out any number of memorable films and any number of films that really caught on in America. I’ll list some of them for you: STRICTLY BALLROOM, ROMPER STOMPER, PRISCILLA QUEEN OF THE DESERT, THE PIANO, MURIEL’S WEDDING, HEAVENLY CREATURES, ONCE WERE WARRIORS AND WHALE RIDER. The directors and producers of these films like Peter Jackson, Jane Campion and Baz Luhrmann have been nominated for Academy Awards. Lee Tamahori went on to direct a Bond film and his star Temuera Morrison went on to be Jango Fett. Russell Crowe broke out in ROMPER STOMPER, Eric Bana in CHOPPER and Nicole Kidman in BMX BANDITS. Ok, she didn’t break out in that film but you know what I mean -- the ties between the Australian film industry and Hollywood are very close.

Does anyone in this movie have that ability? Sure. The actors were actually pretty good -- very naturalistic. And while I don’t think it’s the best movie or even best horror movie I’ve ever seen, it shows promise and ability.

The director’s style and great use of HD technology and the naturalistic acting, more-so than the horror -- although I’ll admit the concept has merit -- leads me to recommend this movie in the end. And there are certain people that this film will absolutely freak out. I think the horror film it most resembles is the TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE -- if you want a better idea of what kind of horror film it is.

But don’t believe me, check it out for yourself. WOLF CREEK is one of the first releases from The Weinstein Co. in collusion with their former entity Dimension Films. It’s being released on Christmas Day.

IN TWO WEEKS: I thought I’d have my long awaited review of THE PROMISE/MASTER OF THE CRIMSON ARMOR for you in this column but due to some technical difficulties with the print, it won’t be ready till the next column. This will be after it’s one week limited release in Los Angeles that starts Christmas day, so I’m telling you now there is a one week release in Los Angeles if you are dying to see it as much as I am.

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Addicted to Bad
by Patrick Keller

International Intrigue
by Alison Veneto

Nocturnal Admissions
by D.K. Holm

Strange Impersonation
by Kim Morgan

Trailer Park
by Christopher Stipp




New DVD Releases
for April 11, 2006

DVD Diatribe
by D.K. Holm

DVD Late Show
by Christopher Mills




Preachin' from the Longbox
by Britt Schramm

Should It Be a Movie?
by Marc Mason

New Comic Book Releases
for April 12, 2006, 2006




New CD Releases
for April 11, 2006

Music for the Masses
by M.C. Bell




TV Recommendations
Boob toob picks of the week by Chris Ryall

Kentucky Fried Rasslin'
by Scott Bowden

TV Pilot Review Archives
by Chris Ryall



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