CRYPTOZOO CREW VOL.1
Written by Allan Gross and Drawn by Jerry Carr
Published by NBM

Tork and Tara Darwyn are your ordinary suburban couple… if your idea of ordinary is “jetting off to the wilds of Africa to find a mythological dinosaur, only to wind up in the jaws of a man-eating plant.” Yep, CRYPTOZOO CREW is basically “Nick and Nora Charles Go Monster Hunting,” and it’s tremendously enjoyable and charming.

Tork is the more single-minded of the pair, heavily focused on whatever weird animal is on his radar, while Tara strives to keep him safe and on the right track… all while outthinking him when it comes to saving their lives. There’s a nice feeling of wit and intimate banter which helps take the concept, which is just dandy, to a level where the characters stand above and apart from the material. That’s a very smart move on Gross’ part.

This volume collects a number of stories that were first serialized online, which seems to be a publishing model that’s been gaining some steam as of late. Some webcomics don’t translate well to the printed page, because the art doesn’t feel right at the new size and resolution. But Carr’s art is very simple, very clean, and it looks terrific here. CRYPTOZOO CREW is a light-hearted, fun book, and should appeal to readers of all ages and genders. Worthwhile reading, both in book and online form.

SIBAM?

Should this be a movie? Absolutely. Run your eyes back up to the review portion: the high concept pitch is spelled out for you right there: “Nick and Nora Charles Go Monster Hunting.” Now, thankfully, no Hollywood halfwit has decided to start remaking the THIN MAN movies with Brad and Angelina, but a series of films based on the spirit of those classics would go down quite nicely. And maybe even generate some well-deserved interest in the originals.

GIANT MONSTER #1
Written by Steve Niles and Drawn by Nat Jones
Published by Boom Studios

I have no capacity to review this book objectively.

You see, I love giant monsters. Beyond reason. They’re my favorite film genre. Back in the mid-90s, before Sony would screw up the idea, I wrote a three-film treatment for a “Godzilla Hits America” series, just to show around. Hell, I refined it again last year. Call me an optimist, I guess. Over the coming holidays, I’ll be having a Gamera triple-feature playing at my house one night. So months ago, when Boom’s head honcho Ross Richie showed me the promotional material for this book, I got a rather warm and happy feeling inside. I believe the only word I could coherently speak was “Yessssssss…”

So, I can sit here and tell you just how much ass this book kicked. Honest, it did. Niles and Jones could have wandered off the map, or pussied their way through it, but they didn’t. It’s funny, gruesome, ridiculously violent stuff. It looks great. It reads snappy. My only complaint is that the next installment isn’t already out. Dammit. Hurry up! Now, you may not believe any of that, since it’s coming from me, but I’m telling you: buy it. It’s cool. I promise.

TRUE PORN VOL.2
Written and Drawn by Various
Published by Alternative Comics

THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK. ALIENS. GODFATHER 2.

TRUE PORN VOLUME 2?

Breaking with pop culture tradition, this sequel outdoes volume one in a big way, offering more emotionally intriguing stories, more humor, stronger artistry, and fewer duds. While the first edition was good, it seems like editors Kelli Nelson and Robyn Chapman really took a good luck at what worked and what didn’t with their first effort and came out this time determined to plug those holes. It isn’t always a given that you can see the editorial hand at work in an anthology book, but like Kazu Kibuishi and FLIGHT, Nelson and Chapman have very much asserted themselves here.

The stories themselves provide an amazing, broad insight into the lives of the creators. The biggest standout for me was “Yawn,” by Ed Malys, perhaps the best story of either of the first two volumes. His take on why he falls asleep during sex, and how that has affected his partners, is absolutely perfect: it’s hilarious, scathing, and even a bit sad, all in the space of four pages. Hell, it was so good that it erased the stories that didn’t quite work out of my mind. That’s what you always hope for out of a solid anthology, but rarely receive.

This book is for adults only, and that’s a serious warning, but for thinking, mature readers, this is a must-read.

STRONGHOLD #1
Written by Phil Hester and Drawn by Tyler Walpole
Published by Devil’s Due

Michael Gray is leading a rather dull, pointless, futile existence. Then he makes the odd decision to commit suicide by heroism by diving into a harsh river to save a drowning girl. But he gets the surprise of his life when he gives up and attempts to die at the bottom: he lives. He doesn’t need to breathe. And that isn’t the strangest thing that will happen to him that day.

What starts out looking like a modern take on “the hero’s journey” takes some intriguing twists and turns along the way, as Michael’s possible role as a potential “chosen one” is purposefully derailed by a young woman taught to revere him his entire life. Ditching her beliefs, she decides to say, “screw the prophecies” and let fate play its hand. No training. No mentoring. No preparing for a coming war. And what happens then… well, then it gets really interesting.

I’ve said it before in this column, and I’ll say it again: as good an artist as Hester is, he’s so damned good at the keyboard that I’d be happy to never see him pick up another pencil. His gift for intricate, surprising plotting is top-notch, and he just seems to find another level to his creative game when he writes. Artists who work from his scripts seem to thrive as well, with Walpole doing some stunning gray-washed art that grounds the book solidly in Michael’s “blah” reality. STRONGHOLD, which has gotten tragically little publicity, is quite possibly the best thing I’ve ever seen Devil’s Due publish, and if enough people find it on the shelves, this book has “company flagship” written all over it.

LOST SQUAD #1
Written by Chris Kirby and Drawn by Alan Robinson
Published by Devil’s Due

“Indiana Jones Meets The Dirty Dozen” is how the press materials describe this book, and that’s a fair take on it. When the government needs someone to step in and stop the Nazis from gaining mystical artifacts that might help them win the war, they don’t call in an archaeologist with a bullwhip; instead, they call in this special Army unit. They have a tank. And a few thousand bullets.

It’s a very clever conceit, and one that works a bit better on paper than it plays out in the first issue. That’s because Kirby is stuck with two problems: trying to introduce his cast in the middle of what is basically a book-length action sequence, and trying to set up the conflicts between them. That makes both of those issues feel rushed at times, and it isn’t helped by the fact that Robinson doesn’t always do a solid job of making sure we can tell who each character is. When you’re introducing a number of new characters to readers, it’s better to bring a bit more variety to their look and dress. That’s easily fixed as the series plays itself out, but it led to confusion here and there in reading this issue.

Certainly, though, I found myself enjoying the book, and when I was done reading, I felt very much like reading more and seeing where they take the concept. Therefore, I have to call this a success.

PURGATORI #1
Written by Robert Rodi and Drawn by Cliff Richards
Published by Devil’s Due

When I opened the envelope and saw this, my first response was “Dear God, no!”

Then I saw the credits. Robert Rodi is a terrific writer. The man wrote WHAT THEY DID TO PRINCESS PARAGON for Pete’s sake! He’s aces. Cliff Richards did some terrific work on BUFFY while it was being published as a comic. So I figured, hey, maybe these two dusting off this moldy old Chaos book won’t be so bad. Maybe they’ll realize that the title character is a stupid-looking, T&A vampire with red skin, wings, and three washcloths for a costume. Maybe they’ll be smart enough to keep her off-panel for the most part, and find a human story to follow. And whaddaya know? They did exactly that. Unfortunately, it’s still awful.

We like to believe that there are no characters or concepts so bad that a clever writer cannot redeem them. That may or may not be true, but I can assure you that spending an entire issue’s worth of story (set in ancient Egypt and featuring the only girl in the village who will admit to being horny) to set up bringing in the title character for a little lesbian sex before she kills someone wasn’t the way. Both creators are capable of much, much better.

AMAZING JOY BUZZARDS VOL.2 #1
Written by Mark Andrew Smith and Drawn by Dan Hipp
Published by Image Comics

The Buzzards are back with a new mini-series, and I’m very, very happy to see it. The book’s first go around was a wonderful, fun little adventure book that only got stronger as the issues shipped. Bringing “The Monkees” sensibility to comics, Smith and Hipp showed a deft touch for humor of the absurd. Plus, they demonstrated knowledge of giving people their money’s worth; you can’t read an issue of JOY BUZZARDS in five minutes. The pages are packed with so much detail and life that you have to take your time and absorb exactly what’s happening.

Volume two is more of the same, which is fine by me. If the creators had backed off, or adjusted their book to try and conform to some sort of artificial marketing concern, I would have been tremendously disappointed. Instead, they give a nice, simple recap of volume one and dive right into the story. This time out, the band is off to Monaco, to play a few shows, and to stop an evil cabal from using a deathray invented by Nicola Tesla himself. There are femme fatales, auto races… everything you can think of that makes no sense but is plenty entertaining. Still some of the most fun you can have reading a comic book today.

FELL #2
Written by Warren Ellis and Drawn by Ben Templesmith
Published by Image Comics

Ellis neo-Holmes experiment compounds on the success of issue one by allowing the title character to begin to settle into his surroundings a bit. Like a movie sequel that doesn’t have to take the time to explain everything again, issue two sets Fell straight into his newest case and into developing his relationship with Mayko the bartender (whom he had a rather odd encounter with in the first issue).

Fell makes for an interesting protagonist; he’s a man who obviously feels rather deeply and who is committed to his job and at least some concept of justice. He isn’t angry, he isn’t horrifically conflicted; he’s really something of a lapsed humanist, and it seems like his job puts him back on that path. For all the notoriety that Ellis has received for creating caustic characters over the years, it’s really ones like Fell where he’s done his warmest work (ORBITER comes to mind).

This issue’s “mystery” takes a backseat, really, to watching Fell actually do the thinking and deducting necessary to working out exactly why dead pregnant women are littering the streets, and why they’re missing their fetuses. It’s a gruesome story, but it never feels lurid, and it even manages to cleverly bridge the gap between Mayko and Fell. Two issues in, and it feels like Ellis has begun building a new masterpiece. Those who’ve been waiting to see what it would be since TRANSMET went away should perk up and start reading.

See you in seven.

Review materials may be sent to: Marc Mason, P.O. Box 26732, Tempe, AZ 85285. You can also find me at Happy Nonsense and The Comics Waiting Room

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