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Week of March 13, 2006

You can take "The Peacemaker," "Deep Impact," and "The Tuxedo." We'll take "Gladiator," "American Beauty" and anything else that didn't suck.

Emilio's 17

Yeah, like he needed all that overpriced crap anyway...

This lawsuit's going to make 'House Party' look like 'House Party Two!'

I told you... don't call me SENIOR!!

Maybe this is all a bad dream too?

Thanks Sharon, but I think I'll wait until this one comes out on DVD (so I can freeze frame of course)

There is absolutely, positively no nepotism in Hollywood. None.

You're good, baby, I'll give you that... but me? I'm magic.

This band will go down like a lead balloon

Well, Goodbye there Children...

They can't sell the Capitol Records building! What will be left to destroy in the next crappy 'end of the world' movie?

Same old Courtney - still sponging off Kurt

Panic on the streets of Austin

You're a fat, Botox faced, wig-wearing ninny! Oh yeah? Well your band has a dirty H addict as a lead singer!

Black Sabbath, Blondie, Miles Davis, The Sex Pistols, Lynyrd Skynyrd Enter Rock Hall



01 THE BREAK-UP $39.17
$12759/av

02 X-MEN: THE LAST STAND $34.02
$9159/av

03 OVER THE HEDGE $20.65
$5170/avg

04 THE DAVINCI CODE $18.61
$4953/avg

05 MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III $4.68
$1756/avg

06 POSEIDON $3.49
$1283/avg

07 RV $3.20
$1469/avg

08 SEE NO EVIL $2.04
$1607/avg

09 AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH $1.36
$17615/avg

10 JUST MY LUCK $855K
$892/avg









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PERFECT PITCH

By David Thomas

June 8, 2004

Pick of the Week

BAD RELIGION, The Empire Strikes First (Epitaph)

This is the first new BAD RELIGION album I’ve liked in years. Their last significant disc was the major label outing Stranger Than Fiction. That was ten years ago. But the group has produced some of their best work on The Empire Strikes First.

All 95 seconds of “Social Suicide” are crucial and the band doesn’t waste a note on aesthetics. There’s a catchy chorus, a few good verses, cool vocal effects and a gritty guitar riff that Brett Gurewitz has perfected over the decades. Greg Graffin’s immortal voice continues to impress years after he’s gone mostly bald. But looks don’t matter to one of the better-read frontmen in rock and roll.

The title track is a complete flashback to classic BAD RELIGION but the main riff, and even the song’s breakdown, sounds like a slow tempo version of a CIV song. That’s how punk can sometimes repeat itself unintentionally; it’s just a limited genre.

Some of the interesting material on the album includes songs co-written by HOT WATER MUSIC’s Chris Wollard. “The Quickening” features an unusual amount of melody for BAD RELIGION and that takes away from Graffin. His vocals aren’t really tailored for such work. Still, Graffin is more than adequate when you compare him to most newcomers.

The second Wollard track, also co-written by BR drummer Brooks Wackerman, is much more reminiscent of HOT WATER MUSIC, while letting Graffin do his thing much more naturally.

But this is not an HWM reviewn is it? The Empire Strikes First stands out as a very acceptable record in a year with very few quality entries. And even though the old school punk band is slowing down, that’s just turned them into a solid rock band.

Indie Pick of the Week

HARKONEN/THESE ARMS ARE SNAKES, Like A Virgin EP (Hydra Head Records)

Two of my favorite new bands meld together in this sludgy EP where they go back and forth with each track ending in a joint orgy of “Touched for the Very First Time.” THESE ARMS ARE SNAKES take the screamed, frenetic route while HARKONEN takes the screamed but somewhat less frenetic route. Of course both come to the same end-point…distortion-laden spasms of rock goodness.

The nice thing about this little EP is that it gives just enough of a taste of these two great bands for newcomers to get an education and offers original content that is free-flowing and unique enough for hardcore believers.

All four tracks leading up to “Touched For The Very First Time” are solid efforts and clock in nicely around the 3 minute mark. What’s nice about the final six minute union is that you can hear the guitarists from both bands feeling each other out, singers taking turns with verses and basically a melding of the minds that sounds completely seamless. It’s just a pleasure to hear two relatively new groups performing at such high levels.

Derivative Pick of the Week

THE HONORARY TITLE, Anything Else But The Truth (Doghouse)

It’s easy to write off THE HONORARY TITLE as yet another DASHBOARD CONFESSIONAL rip-off. So I will. I’m all about the easy way out of a record review. This two-man project is actually the brainchild of one Jarrod Gorbel. His vocals are very lazy but hint at talent. He constantly sounds out of it, like one of those friends you know who isn’t stoned but always sounds like he is. That’s Gorbel.

Drink some caffeine, man. The production and playing is fairly decent and hard to find too much fault in. But the songwriting is generic and sounds mass- produced. The feelings one should get from seemingly emotional songs are diluted by what comes off as a THIRD EYE BLIND aesthetic, and that’s something no one should ever aspire to.

There’s no real stand-out track here that offers a glimmer of hope. Instead all the songs fall to the background as melodically mediocre and offer very little originality. About the only good thing I can say is that the moments where the music stops trying to get girls to swoon and wanders into dark territory shows some promise. If you’re going to sound drugged out you might as well go into that murky area full-on.

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Addicted to Bad
by Patrick Keller

International Intrigue
by Alison Veneto

Nocturnal Admissions
by D.K. Holm

Strange Impersonation
by Kim Morgan

Trailer Park
by Christopher Stipp




New DVD Releases
for April 11, 2006

DVD Diatribe
by D.K. Holm

DVD Late Show
by Christopher Mills




Preachin' from the Longbox
by Britt Schramm

Should It Be a Movie?
by Marc Mason

New Comic Book Releases
for April 12, 2006, 2006




New CD Releases
for April 11, 2006

Music for the Masses
by M.C. Bell




TV Recommendations
Boob toob picks of the week by Chris Ryall

Kentucky Fried Rasslin'
by Scott Bowden

TV Pilot Review Archives
by Chris Ryall



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