By Kevin Hylton
January 7, 2003
DEBBIE DOES OFF-BROADWAY
A Review of DEBBIE DOES DALLAS (the play) and ADULT ENTERTAINMENT
Given Poop Shoot's weekly glimpse into the psyche of porn artists through its porn quote of the week, I feel it appropriate to take a look at two of the more risque shows sliding their way through New York's stages. The words, "good pornography" may appear to be an oxymoron to some readers. "Good theater about porn" may sound even more improbable. But I am here to tell you that today porn is alive and well in the most unlikely of places ... a theatrical stage in New York City.
Few would question the import of late-'70s, early-'80s porn. Films such as TABOO, DEEP THROAT, and DEBBIE DOES DALLAS set the scene for the onslaught of porn to flood the market in the late `80s. Cheap video equipment and rising sales led your next-door neighbors to whip out their Beta cams. P.T. Anderson's sophomore film, BOOGIE NIGHTS, gave film audiences a glimpse into the porn industry. A new film starring Val Kilmer will soon be released with the actor playing the role of late `70s porn star Johnny "Wadd" Holmes. And Paul Schrader just looked at porn through the lens of AUTOFOCUS, his most recent film starring Willem Dafoe and Greg Kinnear.
So why should we be surprised that two of New York's off Broadway theaters opened their doors to shows looking at porn? Sure, the Disney-fication of Times Square stripped Hell's Kitchen of many prostitutes and 8th Avenue of its blocks of peep shows and nudie booths. Amusingly enough, both of these "plays with music" opened downtown, away from Times Square and the view of tourists looking for last minute cancellations for THE LION KING. But now as 9/11 fear slowly fades from the minds of New Yorkers what better topic for the masses than sex?
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ADULT ENTERTAINMENT is showing at the Variety Arts Theatre in lower Manhattan. On paper, the show would seem to be a probable hit. It boasts a few marquis actors, including Danny Aiello, whose performances in Luc Besson's THE PROFESSIONAL and Spike Lee's DO THE RIGHT THING, revealed his acting prowess. Jeannie Berlin, who was nominated for an Oscar for her performance in THE HEARTBREAK KID, also stars in this stage production. And with a script penned by Oscar-nominated screenwriter Elaine May, what could go wrong?
The show tells the story of a group of porn actors who, led by "Frosty Moons" (Jeannine Berlin), plan with the aid of "Guy Akens" (Aiello plays the brother of a deceased fictional porn director) to form their own production company and shoot their own porn film. Each actor or actress is a "name" in the industry. They foresee their future venture to be both a financial juggernaut and a vehicle for them to expand into more "artistic" work. The group enlists the aid of "Gerry DiMarco" (Brandon Demery), a Yale graduate, who volunteers as the cameraman for the porn actors' cable access promotional call-in television show. Gerry sets out to write a porn film that will compare with great films and works of art. Will they succeed in achieving their goal?
Unfortunately, ADULT ENTERTAINMENT is as anemic as a bulimic high school cheerleader prepping for the homecoming dance. It's not that any one aspect of the play is terrible. The problem is that the show lacks any life. The script, if the first act is taken on its face, seems to be intended as a comedy. The only problem is that ninety percent of the jokes rely upon oh-so-familiar porn name puns. We all enjoyed Randal reading his video re-order list of "Big Black Cocks With Pearly White Cum" in Kevin Smith's CLERKS back in 1994, but we're pushing 2003. OK, maybe one or two of those jokes would be fun, but couldn't May have come up with something more amusing about the porn industry? The second act of the script continues along the same line of bland jokes or no jokes at all. At one point it actually appears the play is going to turn into some kind of social commentary. Unfortunately, the script is just so muddled that it would take a special decoder ring to figure out what the author intended and in all likelihood the decoder would just spell out a promotional message for the show itself. I walked out at the end of the play hoping that I missed something. Perhaps May intended to make an analogy between Hollywood and the industry that it condemns. This would have been good fodder for a show. Sadly, even its attempts at musical comedy fail. May interjects video taped, canned musical numbers with titles like "Orangutan Bang." The lyrics are even more pathetic than the titles and all the music does is frustrate an already disjointed play.
As for the acting, it was not wretched. I say that with some caution, since I don't think I've seen five talented actors act as badly as they do in the first act of ADULT ENTERTAINMENT. I'm not sure that means that they acted "badly", "well." I just know the acting in the first act, where Aiello and company portray porn stars who themselves cannot act, is awful. Given Danny Aiello and Jeannine Berlin's acting abilities, I'll give the actors the benefit of the doubt. Aiello has a respectable theatrical resume, including an Obie Award for earlier NY stage work. Overall, I think Aiello and Jeannine Berlin did the best they could with Elaine May's script. Sadly, perhaps the best actor in the show is lost in this play. Brandon Demery, who recently acted in Manhattan Ensemble Theater's production of THE GOLEM (starring Robert Prosky), outshines everyone else in the play. Demery's role is the one saving grace in ADULT ENTERTAINMENT. The bits written for him are by far the most humorous and the only thought provoking pieces of this banal, incomplete puzzle. They are the only hints as to what Elaine May can do and I don't think it's adult entertainment.
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If you're interested in seeing something with a little more pulse, head down to the Jane Street Theatre. The Jane Street now houses an exhilarating "play with music" based on the 80's pornographic film DEBBIE DOES DALLAS. Erica Schmidt adapted and directs this play that first saw a New York stage through New York's Fringe Festival. If you take ADULT ENTERTAINMENT and stand it on its head, DEBBIE DOES DALLAS will fall out. All of the amusing material about porn that lay latent in ADULT ENTERTAINMENT are front and center in DEBBIE. DEBBIE is pure camp. But it is camp done well. What Erica Schmidt understands is that in comedy the best jokes are in the details. It's the stuff going on in the background that keeps people watching and re-watching Monty Python and Steve Martin. Sure there is a place for outright stupidity and outlandish humor, but without layering a show cannot stand. Thankfully, DEBBIE DOES DALLAS is layered with both rich idiotic jokes and subtle humor. For example, Schmidt successfully weaves amusing references to Hawthorne's THE SCARLET LETTER at moments when they garnish an already beautifully prepared dish.
From the moment you walk into the Jane Street Theater you realize you are going to have a good time. The entire venue is decorated as if it is a strip club. The theater is quite small making it an intimate space to see what could be a very big show. The acting here is superb. The cast boasts the talented Sherie Rene Scott in the role of Debbie. Scott and her cast precisely play their over-the-top roles to a tee, providing the necessary winks and nods to make the show hysterical rather than painful. For those who have not seen the original film or are too ashamed to admit it, Debbie is a cheerleader on a high school football cheerleading squad. Her dream is to make it to Dallas to become a professional football cheerleader. Debbie receives a letter inviting her to Dallas to become a member of the squad. Only problem is that she doesn't have the money for the trip. So Debbie and her high school cheer team come up with a plan. The girls form a business that caters to the "needs" of men willing to pay for certain "services." The film, DEBBIE DOES DALLAS, is moronic. As one would expect, it is poorly acted and terribly scripted. The play takes the original film and successfully pokes fun at it and the porn industry.
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One of the biggest successes with DEBBIE DOES DALLAS is its music and lyrics. Andrew Sherman, a successful performer and writer for TV and Film, composed the music to DEBBIE. Unlike the unimaginative-videotaped songs in ADULT ENTERTAIMENT, DEBBIE DOES DALLAS' musical numbers frequently stopped the show. Hilarious raunchy lyrics, combined with music with solid hooks, actually add to the piece. Rick (Jon Patrick Walker), Debbie's boyfriend who is desperate to sleep with his virgin girlfriend, sings, "I wanna do Debbie, that's what I wanna do." When you hear these lines sung soulfully by Walker you cannot help but laugh at the idiocy of the story, situation, and superb comedic performance of Walker himself. To speak about any of the other songs in this show (particularly the candlestick song) would be a treat but would ultimately do a disservice to potential viewers and the show itself. Suffice it to say that DEBBIE DOES DALLAS is a trim hour and a half long one-act that will leave even the stiffest audience members fully satisfied.
Tickets to either show can be obtained through Telecharge at 212-239-6000 or via the web through www.playbill.com.
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