By Chris Ryall
Monday, January 16, 2006
NBA BASKETBALL -- 7:30 PM, TNT
Who said Christmas only comes once a year? Well, at least a rematch of the game played on Christmas, between Shaq and Kobe, can be found here. I'm sure they play for teams, too, but you'd never know it from all the promos.
THE 63RD GOLDEN GLOBE AWARDS -- 8 PM, NBC
The Hollywood Foreign Press, who'll get thanked roughly 742 times during the broadcast, will probably get things more correct than the Oscars once again. At least they break up comedies and dramas, although I'm not sure they put WALK THE LINE in the right grouping.
24 -- 8 PM, Fox
I think Jack Bauer has a pretty good fighting chance against even the Hollywood Foreign Press tonight. Read about the winners later, and catch Jack now.
TRUTH -- 9 PM, Lifetime
Once, he was signed by the Buffalo Bills and played Superman on TV. And now... Dean Cain is resorting to appearing in a Lifetime movie. Doesn't he know this channel's Kryptonite to guys?
DOMINICK DUNNE'S POWER, PRIVELEGE AND JUSTICE -- 10 PM, CourtTV
Season Premiere: This show's been on for six seasons now, and it seems in that time, I've been found guilty of never even watching it once.
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart: Eugene Jarecki
The Late Show with David Letterman: TBD
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno: Paula Abdul, Randy Jackson, Simon Cowell
The Jimmy Kimmel Show: Ashlee Simpson
Late Night with Conan O'Brien: Elijah Wood, Michael Rappaport, Brian Regan (R)
The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Allison Janney, the 88
Last Call with Carson Daly: TBD
Tuesday, January 17
AMERICAN IDOL -- 8 PM, Fox
Season Premiere: It's my least-favorite day of the TV year! And really, does anyone still care about these people? Outside of Kelly Clarkson, has anyone done anything except become another trivia question? Wait a decade, Bo Bice, and I'm sure you can be a talking head on a VH-1 retrospective.
SCRUBS -- 9 PM, NBC
Did I say last week that this show seemed a bit tired? I take it all back... it's as good as ever. I just wish NBC would ration it a bit and stop burning off two new episodes each week. I'd like it to be around a while.
SUPERNATURAL -- 9 PM, WB
BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER's Darla shows up here tonight, keeping her "supernatural TV show appearances" streak intact a while longer.
LOVE MONKEY -- 10 PM, CBS
Debut: The promos try way too hard to explain why the show's called what it is, and no drama outside a police procedural on CBS should sound appealing, and yet all that aside, I'm into the idea of seeing ED as a music industry guy looking for love. Even with the sure-to-be-dated music references.
KING OF VEGAS -- 10 PM, Spike
Debut: Hey, a new gambling show set in Las Vegas! Wow, that's so current. What next, Spike, a new police procedural? I hear those are all the rage, too.
DAISY DOES AMERICA -- 10 PM, TBS
Season Finale: Not after tonight, she doesn't.
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart: L. Paul Bremer
The Late Show with David Letterman: TBD
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno: Heath Ledger
The Jimmy Kimmel Show: Michael Chiklis
Late Night with Conan O'Brien: Martin Lawrence, Soweto Gospel Choir
The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Ming Tsai, Paula Poundstone
Last Call with Carson Daly: TBD
Wednesday, January 18
WATERCOOLER -- 7 PM, TV Guide
This special will become a regular series that looks at the TV week's highlights (not that they'll do it as well as I do), but really, the title needs to change. After all, when's the last time anyone brought up the TV Guide Channel at the office, watercooler or elsewhere?
SOUTH BEACH -- 8 PM, UPN
This week, exec-producer J-Lo gets her wedding tape stolen again. Well, maybe not, but that'd surely be more entertaining than her cheeseball new show.
LOST -- 9 PM, ABC
Nice to see the show back new, and I'm still intrigued by it, but that black smoke-creature from last week was just a bit lame. Okay, more than a bit. ABC can't afford better CGI at this point?
SKATING WITH CELEBRITIES -- 9 PM, Fox
Debut: The only way I'd be into watching has-beens like Todd Bridges and Debbie Gibson skate around on the ice is if Marty McSorley comes out of retirement and brings his oversized hockey stick with him.
THE X-FILES -- 3 AM, TNT
You might think this is an odd time for an X-FILES rerun, even for this one which guest-stars Peter Boyle, but really, after calling in to Art Bell's show, what else is an X-FILES fan to do?
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart: James Woolsey
The Late Show with David Letterman: TBD
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno: Colin Firth, Mike Shinoda's Fort Minor
The Jimmy Kimmel Show: TBD
Late Night with Conan O'Brien: TBD
The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: TBD
Last Call with Carson Daly: TBD
Thursday, January 19
EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS -- 8 PM, UPN
The holidays, and new babies, throw me off--I'd kinda forgotten all about this show, but now that I'm reminded of it, let me remind you that it's definitely worth your time, too.
CSI -- 9 PM, CBS
CBS keeps riding that Quentin Tarantino guest-director episode this season, with yet another link to that show's burial-alive of Nick.
MY NAME IS EARL -- 9 PM, NBC
Finally, a Stiller guest-spot that won't annoy me! That's because it's not Ben, but his wife, Christine "Marcia Brady" Taylor, who shows up here.
THE O.C. -- 9 PM, Fox
I know most of the time we all try not to notice how hot the too-young sister is getting on these types of shows (see: PARTY OF FIVE, BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER) but now Fox makes that even more difficult by finally bringing back Marissa's little sister, and sexin' her up in a big way.
THE OFFICE -- 9 PM, NBC
Jim never should've told Michael about his crush on Pam... and if you don't know what I'm talking about, you owe it to yourself to start watching this show already.
CRUMBS -- 9:30 PM, ABC
If it tells you anything about how forced this show is, it features William Devane, who never met a piece of dialogue he didn't over-chew. His obnoxious over-acting on 24 last year wasn't a fluke, y'know.
The Daily Show with Jon Stewart: Nathan Lane
The Late Show with David Letterman: TBD
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno: Albert Brooks
The Jimmy Kimmel Show:
Late Night with Conan O'Brien: Kate Beckinsale
The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Vanessa Williams
Last Call with Carson Daly: TBD
Friday, January 20
HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL -- 8 PM, Disney
I think Brian Lynch's version would've been better...
MALCOLM IN THE MIDDLE -- 8:30 PM, Fox
You think TV actors aren't overpaid? If it tells you anything, one of the kids on this show just recently bought Nick and Jessica's mansion, and it wasn't Malcolm. Or even Dewey, who deserves it.
STARGATE ATLANTIS -- 9 PM, Sci Fi
There's no way this show wouldn't cross over with SG-1--it just makes too much sense--and tonight, SG-1's Beau Bridges appears here as expected.
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA -- 10 PM, Sci Fi
Whoever would've thought Stands With Fist would have such a strong presence on a show like this? Not me, but she's here doing a great job week in and week out.
The Late Show with David Letterman: TBD
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno: Dennis Miller
The Jimmy Kimmel Show: Method Man, Motion City SOundtrack
Late Night with Conan O'Brien: TBD
The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson: Mimi Rogers
Last Call with Carson Daly: Cheryl Hines, Jay Hernandez, Panic! At the Disco
Saturday, January 21
MISS AMERICA -- 8 PM, CMT
Is this what the Miss America pageant has come to? Airing on CMT? Do that few people still care about it? Or is it just easier to ogle the women if the show airs on a coun try music channel?
BENNY HILL MARATHON -- 9 PM, BBC America
Sure, if you watch a few of these, you'll swear you've just watched the same episode over and over. But at least it's a pretty amusing episode, in that quaint '70s British way.
DENNIS MILLER: ALL IN -- 10 PM, HBO
Dennis Miller, ever looking for a way to seem cool, does a gig from Vegas and tries to hitch his wagon to the poker craze from last year. What next, Dennis, raving about the joys of TiVo? Catch up with the times, man.
FRESH BAKED VIDEOGAMES -- 12 AM, Spike
Hey, Spike, Seth Green called. ROBOT CHICKEN would like its idea back. Still, I'll admit I'm a sucker for these kinds of things. Take that, Pitfall Harry!
SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE -- 11:30 PM, NBC
Host: Peter Sarsgaard; Musical guest: The Strokes
Sunday, January 22
DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES -- 9 PM, ABC
Finally, the two words I think everyone has been waiting for in regards to this show: nun fight!
BLEAK HOUSE -- 9 PM, PBS
I can't imagine many X-FILES fans are hanging out and watching public television, but if they want to see Dana Scully back on TV, they'll learn where it's at on their cable system and check out this show.
#1 SINGLE -- 10 PM, E!
Debut: Lisa Loeb goes from cooking with a Zappa to slumming on E!, documenting her dates and.. man, I can't go on. Reality really does bite.
BOONDOCKS -- 11 PM, Cartoon
Hey, Aaron McGruder, hope those fat checks cash nicely. Because other than cashing in, all I've seen here is a show that doesn't capture the spirit of the comic strip at all. Beyond the dated black references, that is.
All show times Pacific Standard Time and all opinions are skating on thin ice.
Chris Ryall
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