August 9, 2004
Rock Star Quote of the Week:
"It means I'll never have to work again."
-- Don McLean, upon being asked what 'American Pie' means
It Was Twenty Cents So, You Know, I Bought It: Upon realising that his broken record player is now inexplicably working, Reuben Ham rediscovers his stash of cheap vinyl. Plus! Submit your favourite tunes for the VELVET treatment!
TEENAGE FANCLUB – Norman 3, Thirteen (1993)
Pretty melodies! Prettier harmonies! Crunchy guitars! Sample lyric: 'I'm in love with you'! Better than sex, smack, and... erm... SIMPLE PLAN!
TEARS FOR FEARS – Mad World, The Hurting (1983)
All the soul-destroying ennui of Gary Jules's DONNIE DARKO soundtrack rendition! But it has, like, beats, and you can dance 'the robot' to it!
LLOYD COLE & THE COMMOTIONS – Rattlesnakes, Rattlesnakes (1984)
If you looked up 'jangle-pop' in an 'encyclopaedia of music' you'd find a picture of a stout bespectacled man wearing headphones. He'd refuse to acknowledge your presence, remove his spectacles, nonchalantly proceed to polish them, place them atop his nose once more, cough, check his watch, and politely ask if you wouldn't mind terribly, well... pissing off. Yes, he is listening to Rattlesnakes.
THE KINKS – You Really Got Me, Kinks (1964)
The birth of metal! Follow that strumming finger from one note to its next-door-neighbour, and then back to the original note! Repeat forever! Uh... something about girls! Girls! Booze! Riffs! Funny hats!
THE PSYCHEDELIC FURS – Torch, Book Of Days (1989)
Melody almost vows to threaten to soar, but never does! Vocalist is sucking on a big sodding lump of sour-mash-sodden gauze, and is upset that it rains all the time where he lives! Turn on all the taps, run around the house and relate!
The Give-Reuben-Some-Material-To-Work-With Appeal:
People: suggest some tunes that need to be lauded, exposed, over-analysed, enjoyed or ridiculed by a wider audience. And tell me why. I'll seek out the most interesting suggestions and feature them in VELVET soon. Point your beloved ditties at shadowrain@hotmail.com.
© Reuben Ham
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