November 1, 2004
Quotes of the Week:
"Guitars are for making noises. I've done songs and played guitar without playing a single proper note in it."
-- William Reid
"Obviously people aren't going to realise things for themselves unless you firmly implant the seed of the idea in their brain. [W]e always tried... in the past, to do it subliminally. Now we've realised that you've basically got to drill a hole in people's skulls."
-- Rowland S. Howard
"I don't expect to go anywhere, in fact I expect to have to climb to get to hell."
-- Nick Cave
"The last time I went to the doctor he said I can't listen to loud music anymore."
-- Kevin Shields
What I Did On My Holiday: Reuben Ham conquers writer's block, nausea, ennui and an empty bar-fridge by listening to bubblegum pop and THE BIRTHDAY PARTY...
ERIC CARMEN – That's Rock'N'Roll, Eric Carmen (1975)
Aw, man. The former RASPBERRIES frontman gives us a tune with all the gooey sweetness of the BEACH BOYS and all the offer-up-your-firstborn-to-Bacchus rock-as-religion ecstasy of MOTORHEAD. This makes me jump up and down and look stupid but feel as if I'm riding a Valkyrie at the gates of Valhalla. It's also pretty as fuck. Put down your Shakespeare; get dumb and drunk and divine...
SUNNYBOYS – Afraid To Love, Get Some Fun (1984)
Unknown pop band from Australia. In the eighties. Too earnest to be cheesy; too concerned with enjoying their rock'n'roll to have anything to say. Sing along and laugh at anyone who tried to do anything else ever. When not played by the RAMONES, three chords should pump your nads like nothing since seventeenth-century satirical theatre.
THE GO-BETWEENS – Bachelor Kisses, Spring Hill Fair (1984)
First track on the album in question. Delicious chiming jangling ringing la-la-la goodness from obtuse Australian pop band who spend the rest of this record being spiky and important and somewhat less tuneful. But this is where it's at: a melody stolen from MORRISSEY's back-pocket, stapled to a crushed gladioli; guitar lines stolen from Johnny Marr's chest-pocket while mesmerised by a transistor radio, cosmically shrugging at the fact that no-one who played music prior to 1983 was ever as good as THE SMITHS. It's okay, Johnny: we understand.
THE BOX TOPS – Trains & Boats & Planes, Superhits (1969)
ALEX CHILTON's white-soul boy-band in the sixties. It's the soon-to-be frontman of BIG STAR singing fuckin' BACHARACH melodies. How can you criticise this?
THE ROMANTICS – Tomboy, Superhits [yes, I am a chump] (1980)
Better than THE CLASH. (Better than which song?) All of it.
THE ROLLING STONES – Moonlight Mile, Sticky Fingers (1971)
Because we can all relate to being young, high and rich. And artists. If we clench really hard...
THE SUNDAYS – Wild Horses, Blind (1992)
Kills the original in every respect. More yearning, more teenage-ness, more echoing guitars, more ontological relevance! And, and... a cuter vocalist!
JEFF BUCKLEY – I Shall Be Released, Live At Sin-E [Deluxe/Legacy Edition] (2003)
You'll like this even if you don't like BOB DYLAN. Note: I don't really like DYLAN. I like this. Additional Note: BUCKLEY was better than everyone since DYLAN, including DYLAN, including his own father, excepting ELLIOTT SMITH. Get to know this. Fuck 'Hound Dog' and 'Eleanor Rigby'. Fuck the 5th Symphony. Fuck Hamlet and the Holy Bible and CITIZEN KANE. This is where your ears and crawling skin should be.
ELLIOTT SMITH – Pretty (Ugly Before), From A Basement On The Hill (2004)
Someone is doing something brilliant and breathtaking in 2004!!! This week's reason for drinking...
TODD RUNDGREN – Wolfman Jack, Something/Anything? (1972)
Todd shut himself away from everything and played everything and took everything and was evocative and looked cool with too-long hair. Let's follow his lead, and anoint this as the soundtrack barrelling us into the horizon...
THE BIRTHDAY PARTY – Fears Of Gun, Mutiny / The Bad Seed EPs (originally 1983)
Making-it-seem-like-everyone-after-BILL HALEY-was-just-pretending since 1980: Nick and the boys.
© Reuben Ham
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